The last few weeks, I have been gathering a bucket list of things I want to see and do before my time is up. Before this year, I was afraid to dream. Mostly because my dreams never came true and life always changed my plans to do the things I really want to do. For that reason, I quit dreaming and started just trudging thru life out of obligation and desire to please others.
Isolating and not dreaming made me feel safe and like I couldn’t fail. But, Oh, how wrong I was. In spite of my self-protection efforts, I failed at many things along the way. When I did realize a dream, I did not give myself credit for my successes.
The ability to only see your failures, causes you to lose your self-esteem and makes you vulnerable to control by other things like drugs, drinking etc. Although I don’t have addictions, I struggled with my need for self-protection.
Regularly indulging in small pleasures, getting absorbed in challenging activities, setting and meeting goals, maintaining close social ties, and finding purpose beyond oneself all increase life satisfaction. It’s not happiness that promotes well-being, it’s the actual pursuit of happiness that’s important.
I’m still learning who I am and what I want out of life. I just dont want my life to take away who I am.
I’m super scared to risk to dream and fail but if I don’t try, I’ll never reach the impossible.
Until next time, I am being MJ every day.